Live List

The Washington Obligation

Falling Northwest

I took these at the Japanese Gardens while visiting Portland last fall. These tiny trees were a huge part of my incessant inclination to make my way up into the Pacific Northwest. For years I’ve wanted to photograph these Japanese Maples. Finally, I couldn’t take it any more so I made my way to them…

Running Out

Portland also educated me about a remarkable magic power that I never knew I possessed!  This is a Portland-specific-magic that disables me from locating—or even nearing—any destination I set out for while in Portland… not at the time when I was actually looking for it, at least. I’ve named this power the Washington Obligation.

If I wanted to get to the highway, I ended up in Washington.

If I wanted to get off the highway, I ended up in Washington.

If I wanted to get gas, I ended up in Washington.

If I wanted to go South, I had to start further North—in Washington.

Tiny Gardens

I ended up in Washington at least once, each and every time I attempted to go anywhere via car. The number of journeys that had a much higher percentage of unintentional Washington excursions than ONE, is pretty near perfect. The odds that I would spend at least an hour trying to find my way away from Washington were the best I’ve ever come across. I’d bet everything I owned against the event that I’d make a Washington-free excursion. There were no conditions that could disprove such inerrant odds, apparently.

Magic.

Strange Days

I had no choice but to conform to and gracefully embrace this new and ironic destiny. I was abnormally gifted in finding this destiny, at least. For some reason, it was absolutely necessary that I make an appearance in Washington before I could make any impact on the fates. Only after I had fulfilled the Washington Obligation was I able to persuade the gods of coincidental junctions to compel my misadventures in the direction of, well, anywhere besides Washington.

The fundamental element of this deviating destiny is that I be delivered to a location of exceptional interest. It is, however, essential to the existence of this particular element that these conditions are strictly met:

• The unconsciously manifested location which I was to be relayed to MUST never be that one which I had originally sought.

• The tangential terrain obtained MUST be in the complete opposite direction of the initial target site.

• The providential place of my quest MUST materialize and prevent my passing without any portent.

I claim magic… the other option to explain this is far too rational for my taste.

Tranquil Trees

Cheers!

This is when I tire of painting… I turn to coloring. Sharpie Inspired.

There is somewhat of a reason behind this activity… as  much of a reason that you’ll ever get from me.

When I was having my house built I asked for an extra cable outlet and plug—one of each. I got both of these, but I also ended up with about 4x as many plugs/face-plates that usually come standard in a residential dwelling. When I claim they are excessive, I mean that to the truest sense. I have one of those plugs about very 2.5 feet throughout the house and one about every 7 inches in my kitchen. I could power up half a BestBuy within my kitchen alone—it’s ridiculous.

So after spending a good two years painting walls in pleasantly obnoxious colors I was instantly annoyed with the multitude of white boxes glaring at me from every direction. It drove me nuts. The sharpies made their move (5) one beer infested night and then I let myself subdue the electrical after-effect with the slightly more professional acrylic paint as the second (4) white box became a memory.

It should also be noted that I could very easily live my life with a total of two plugs… so the superfluous power appendages made their existence a bit more daunting to my sanity.

April 29th, 2009: Two new additions

May 17th, 2009

Just thought I’d share.